Food For Thought
Eating*________ won’t hurt.
Obsessing about it will.
*fill in the blank
from More to Love, © Elizabeth Patch, all rights reserved
You know that dark conversation in your head?
The one that makes you feel guilty, ashamed and miserable for “cheating” on your diet.
The one that convinces you that you are a weak, worthless person who will never succeed at anything because you broke a rule about eating.
The one that says “Hey! You might as well go ahead and eat until you hurt yourself, because you are already a failure“.
If you’ve ever followed one of the gazillion diets that have come along, you have probably felt all sorts of negative emotions for eating a forbidden food, terrible feelings that far outweigh the “damage” that the food itself may have done. Sometimes those negative feelings last far longer than the diet ever lasted, and they certainly last longer than the food itself!
So you had some pizza...
Or you ate one of the donuts that your co-workers brought into work.
Or you went hungry all day and overate at night.
So now you have to punish yourself with horrible, helpless, hopeless thoughts?
So now you have to punish yourself by going on an eating binge?
So now you have to punish yourself by trying to eat on starvation rations?
So now you have to punish yourself by making other negative choices
that continue to prove how bad you really are?
Here’s a different question:
Doesn’t all this self-pity seem just a little bit ridiculous and melodramatic?
I’m not a therapist.
I’m just a woman like yourself, who grew up in a culture filled with deliciously high calorie food, aggressively advertised and made available 24/7.
A bizarrely twisted culture that also values underweight women as the most beautiful and desirable creatures on the planet.
But it doesn’t take a therapist to see a big conflict between the physical drive to eat and the emotional desire to be valued.
Or how sugar and fat and guilt and sin got all mixed up in a horrible mess that poisons our hearts as much as our bodies.
So you had an extra cookie?
Maybe you made that choice because cookies are “not allowed”,
and so now they seem irresistible.
Maybe you were bored.
Maybe you were just being polite.
Maybe you actually were hungry and you really enjoyed every delicious bite!
It really doesn’t matter why you ate what you ate.
Forgive yourself.
Move on.
Cookies and pizza and chips and *whatever* are a fact of modern life.
Sometimes you will eat them.
Sometimes you won’t.
If eating *whatever* is a source of pleasure,
then enjoy it fully, completely and with no regrets.
If eating *whatever* causes emotional pain, or makes you feel ill,
remember the feeling and make a less painful choice next time.
But whatever your choices are,
stop punishing yourself for making a choice!
Wishing you happier thoughts!
love,
elizabeth
ps: Eating disorders and depression are no joke, and my funny little pictures will not fix them.
If you or someone you know is suffering from ED, get help immediately.
If you or someone you know is suffering from obsessive thoughts of worthlessness or other signs of depression, get help immediately.
This is such a wonderful post filled with so many helpful tips and ideas. Thanks Elizabeth.
I always give myself one splurge meal a week…otherwise I go crazy! But yeah, it's hard to deal with the temptations all around us. I've found writing down everything I eat makes a huge difference but then I cheat on my diet and put the journal aside to pick up on a day when I can be good all day!
Thanks for the insight. You're right. I ate an extra hotdog for lunch. It was really good, you know the kind cooked on a grill and slightly overdone in certain areas, my favorite. It took all of ten minutes to eat and all afternoon to fill guilty about enjoying it! I really appreciate your blog!
I love your blog, Elizabeth, and the first thing I plan to do when I get home is order your book.
fabulous post….so true….It's time to not feel guilty….I'm one too that thinks if we only eat the super healthy bran all our lives are we really enjoying life?….Happy SITS day
Elizabeth,
I just love your sketches – and you really captured the dialogue that goes on for people around eating. Just imagine the energy that could go to other, more pleasurable things if we all stopped worrying about what we "should" and "shouldn't" eat. Unfortunately, dieting creates so much obsession around food – but when, instead, we let ourselves trust our bodies and eat what we're hungry for, food becomes an amazing source of nourishment and pleasure – without all of the anxiety!
Stopping by from SITS to say hi
Just started blogging today and wrote my first post ever….
I read that you work at a school. Check out my post it may be something you would find helpful! Also great post and wonderful art work!
Stopping by from SITS – and this is a GREAT post!!!
Hey—great advice—I would fill in cheese cake in that spot, by the way….
Congrats on the interview im off to go follow and show then some comment love! Thank you for visiting my blog and for the kind comment
I really hope we can help schools/teachers etc…raise much needed funds for the kids!
I am such a binge eater….it is not fun but it is fun to tell others about. :-0
Stopping by from Eva's blog. Hop over for a visit too!
-Cougs
http://www.cougar-tales.blogspot.com
Another great post! Happy SITS Feature Day!!
Wow. What an amazing post. I am a huge emotional eater.
This is so true too! It really does more harm than good to beat yourself up over a bad choice. Better to chalk it up to experience and learn from it.
Congrats on your SITS day!
You’re right, those foods are a fact of modern life. When people look back out our society in a few hundred years, I think our modern food system is what will stand out to them the most. I can already hear them saying “can you believe they ate that stuff?” If you haven’t seen it yet, you’ve gotta watch “Food Inc” –brilliant!!
I’ve had these conversations many times! I really do need to be kinder to myself. This is a great reminder. Happy SITS day! I’ve really enjoyed all your posts.
Good post with a good attitude!
One last Happy SITS Day!
Cheers
- CoconutPalmDesigns
As soon as I tell myself I cannot eat, I head straight for the fridge! I do better when I don’t feel restricted. What do you think?
Sarah Baron
http://www.anonymous8.com
Ooooh I love this post! I’ve been trying to lose weight for my upcoming wedding, and I always feel guilty about the pizza.
Mmmmm pizza…
Stopping by from SITS,,,
COULD NOT AGREE More!,,, I was just talking to a friend yesterday about how I need some mental strength as much as physical or emotional strength. That I need to be mentally strong enough to resist the foods that are going to make me lethargic later,, but I also need mental strength to not obsess and beat myself up for my choice be they helpful or not helpful.
I’m not sure how to achieve or gain this strength,, but isnt accepting that you have a problem the first step!?hahaha
Excited to follow and read more!
This is wonderful! Nicely put because we shouldn’t feel guilty for enjoying our food.
Another great post .. esp the beginning ” Eating ___ wont hurt,Obsessing abt it will…”
One last time Happy SITS day to u .
Have a gr8 day !!
Dropping by from SITS… wow… what a different way to think about it.
Good insight. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve beaten myself up!
You are an amazing artist. Kudos to combining your artwork – and your words in one forum.
OK, I will be reading you all the time…I loved every single post I read today!!
Well said. Very well said. I am losing weight in a slow healthy way and have not been beating myself up over “cheating.”