I often find myself dreaming
of the perfect, simple, quiet, beautiful life
free of drama and stress…
It involves long, unbroken stretches of quiet time where I can write and draw and paint and garden.
In this dream world, I take long walks in picturesque and unspoiled countryside.
I am in great physical condition from time spent practicing yoga and dance.
I eat slow, leisurely home-cooked meals,
and linger over glasses of wine with friends.
My home is clean and organized,
and I never, ever have to take care of anyone else.
I travel, I take French lessons or learn how to…
In reality, however,
my life is a jumble of multi-tasking events
as I run from job to home to chore to obligation.
It consists of a zillion little things that seem incredibly important to accomplish,
but actually add up to a chronic feeling of
exhaustion and stress.
Not a very inspiring truth from someone who is trying to inspire and encourage others!
Everyone always says “follow your dreams”
but the comparison between my actual life and my dream life sometimes seems hopeless…
In one of my stress-induced, melodramatic rants
I heard myself whining:
I’ll never have the time or money
to live the life of my dreams!
How can I possibly add more unstructured creative time, increase my physical activity,
enjoy leisure and beauty in my life when I can barely find 15 free minutes to myself?
And then it struck me: I can find 15 minutes!
I can give myself the gift of 15 minutes.
15 minutes in the shower to just feel the calming heat of the water,
instead of making lists for the day ahead (or feeling irritated by the dirty, out-of-date bathroom).
15 minutes to stretch my neck and shoulders during my lunch break.
15 minutes to walk around my suburban backyard before I go inside and take care of my family.
15 minutes to cut up some fruit, or make myself a sandwich or scramble some eggs,
rather than mindlessly eat from a bag of chips while wondering what to eat.
15 minutes to write in a journal, even if I have to stop mid-sentence.
15 minutes to doodle in a sketchpad, even if I have to stop mid-drawing.
15 minutes to actually start following my dreams, even if it is a very pared down version of the dream!
“The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.”
But perhaps, a journey to a healthier, happier life simply begins with the baby steps of 15 minutes to yourself.
a related post on finding small bites of pleasure in life
(or why the diet mindset can prevent you from enjoying everything, not just food.)
When can you find 15 minutes to yourself?
What will you do with those 15 minutes?
PS: I love these 5 minute “yoga breaks” that talk you gently through some simple stress-relieving stretches.
This is where it starts, finding 15 minutes at a time for myself.
To do for others, you have to recharge yourself.
There has to be something in the cup before you can give.
In the hustle and bustle, sometimes it’s hard to just get quiet and think and be
for, say, 15 minutes.
It is well worth it.
It’s where direction begins.
What do I want?
Why do I want it?
Where do I want to go?
How will I get there?
Who do I want on the journey with me?
Good questions, and there are answers.
Here is to finding them.
thank you for this lovely comment! it is so true that there has to be time for oneself to think & recharge, especially when there are so many questions about which direction your life could take.
Hi Elizabeth! I loved what you wrote on “15 Minutes to Myself”. That is so me. Love D xxx
thank you Dee!
Awesome post! You are so right: 15 minutes here and there make a good start towards living the life of your dreams.
thanks Kathy!
I really enjoyed this post because it reminds me that yes, I do have 15 minutes that I can take to myself. I think sometimes I have two problems. The first is that I have the problem of not making those 15 minutes count, and not being fully in the moment and feel I need more time, which just pushes off the other things I need to get done. The second is that I will do the opposite, I’ll take zero time for myself and feel guilty for doing so. In the past several months I’ve learned a lot of balance in recovery from my eating disorder and I am doing a much better job of taking time for myself.
Alex I am happy to hear that you are making progress in recovery, it’s an ongoing process and I encourage you to keep going!
Taking zero time for one’s self is a habit that so many of us have and so is the idea that 15 minutes aren’t enough to accomplish anything, so why bother? Baby steps aren’t as fast as running, 15 minutes isn’t the same as a whole day to yourself, but even small changes can take you down the same path!